Am I really that unworthy?? cant fight the thoughts, feeling, depression–sigh..I have mentioned before the place I live–not sure if wrote how got here–long story if didnt–but I live upstairs from my landlord–used to be someone else, but now is not the best environment–dont see them much at all–the male is a pothead, alcoholic, animal abuser and loud, (we say emotional abuser at the least) anyway the upstairs, where we live has never been finished–something we have been promised for years and years–now keep in mind as you read this, that we have looked for other places, just cant find a place to take someone like us, and it is we need a place that my son can still get to school, us store, ect since no transportation–anyway, this place was suppose to be finished–but it never has been, the floors themselves are horrible, ugly—let alone the leaks in the ceiling, the leaks in the roof, the mold from the leaks, unfinished base boards, a deck (upper) that is falling apart–the leaks destroyed lots of stuff of ours, and the other room is not longer usable do to mold, the winter heat doesnt come up this far, and the central air doesnt either (when they choose to run it)–yeah the landlord knows this, seen it, and yeah has made promises–but now that is few and far between–we quit saying anything and just started documenting, and taking pics–wish could report it, but dont know how—my son has a docs excuse for the mold, and the males cigarette smoking, it hurts his lungs and his lung condition-the extreme heat and cold does too-but that doesnt matter to anyone–the yelling, noise, certain things that are done trigger our PTSD, as well as flashbacks, ect–things we wont get into–but when that happens there are times we cower and yeah just want it to stop—again things the landlord knows, things we have complained about, requested, ect–nothing is done..EVER
Does anyone hear us??? are we worthy of anything?? are we worthy of anything good in our life???ever???
is that reality, or the depression talking????